OMGOMG! We have a Guest Review! Not just any Guest Review, a Guest Review by the incomparable Bruce P.! And not only a review by Bruce, but his 10th review here on Okazu! Settle in, folks, this is going to be a heckuva ride, but you’re in capable hands. Take it away, Bruce!

Heavily discounted, pulled from a dark shelf in the way, way back at Mandarake, Kinoko Ningen no Kekkon  (きのこ人間の結婚) by Murayama Kei had the aura of nasty all over it. From the half-dressed bubble-headed girls clinging to each other on the cover to the title itself—Marriage of the Mushroom People—it promised awful. Really awful. A Yuritetsu for the mycological set. Naturally I snapped it up.

Well, it isn’t awful. I don’t intend to sound disappointed, but in fact, it is actually a ripping good story, in a quirky sort of way, if you can get over the fungus-infected spiders. Definitely in the sub-genre of hobby enthusiast’s manga, written to appeal to anyone who has specific interest in both (a) mushrooms, molds, and allied fungi, and (b) Yuri, and who doesn’t want to have to read two books to get them. But Yuritetsu it assuredly is not.

Ariara and Eriera are getting married. Yes, they are mushrooms, which accounts for their being dressed in filmy mushroom stem annuli. It’s not service, it’s…botanical precision. Their marriage is a very special event in Damp Town. Not because they are both women, there’s nothing unusual about that in a world where the entire population happens to be female, but because it’s a great opportunity for everyone to get happily plastered. And that they do, as A and E head off to their new home and life together. A is a shepherd and E had been a scribe but is now learning the shepherding business, so that they can always be together, out in the fungus fields happily shepherding away. They’re so darn cute as they guide their flock of one-celled amoebas into the abattoir and lustily hack them up into sandwiches.

But their bliss is short-lived, even in mushroom years. Eriera gets sick—it’s root rot—and it’s very bad, and though she lives through it, the operation leaves her disfigured and unable to bear children. Or to father them either, which is the efficient way these things can work in this world. Ariara angrily rejects the clucking advice of sententious townfolk who suggest she should divorce damaged goods. They’re married, they’re in love, they will stay together and that’s that.

Or is it?

One of those little ‘Honey, maybe I should have told you this before the wedding…’ items that Eriera just never got around to mentioning, was that as a child she had attracted the affectionate interest of a very important person indeed, a member of the royal family—the young Princess #3. The all-powerful Fungal Queen and her three princesses are dangerous, arrogant, and psychotic, enthusiasts of strict legal interpretation when it suits them, and of arbitrary capital punishment when it doesn’t. Exactly the type you want to hear is carrying a torch for your wife. Princess #3 arranges to have E kidnapped and brought to her, because she’s a princess and can do what she wants, and have fun doing it. Her minions oblige, leaving A behind in a bloody heap.

That’s their mistake. Because Ariara gets up, wipes the blood from her eyes, and sets out to bring Eriera back. And throughout the entire rest of the book there is nothing that can stop her. Slime-mold guards riding tarantulas she brushes aside. Sheer cliffs she scales with one arm behind her back. Rings of magic fire she leaps through, mighty sword Nothung in hand…well, you get the idea. She actually is impressive. Very impressive. And she wins. She brings Eriera home.

There was never a doubt. Not for someone so focused that she can abruptly coldcock the muscular young woman who has helped them to escape the princess’s castle tower, on the basis that three’s a crowd.

There is a curious epilogue in which Ritsu from K-On! rides in on a tarantula, which seems a rather natural fit, at that, and winds up with a cute girlfriend. It’s not Mio, but that may be for the best. They look very happy together.

The art is pleasant enough, though hardly stellar. It’s somewhat sketchy, and occasionally a little obscure. There is a scene in which Ariara takes a rifle-wielding guard hostage. She does so by threatening her with what might be a banana. If so, it’s an effective banana.

Yuri is the natural backdrop in the world depicted, and the framework for the main couple’s story, but it is not the point of the story. Only one character actively engages in a little Yuri frolicking: the insouciant Princess #2, who doesn’t appear much, but when she does is considerably more interested in fiddling with her cute handmaiden than in overseeing the provincial merchants’ production inventory valuation lists (imagine).

Ratings:

Art: 6. Somewhat rough and ready, but fair enough to support the story. Not hesitant to depict all ages—young, old, and very old—quite naturally. The muscular characters (the scribes, who are stone masons as well) are very muscular indeed. And the different fungal species are well drawn. If you want to consider that a plus.

Story: 8. A fun little yarn. The plot does occasionally slow down at some long-winded legalistic discussions about things like boundary marker disputes and fishing rights.

Characters: 8. Good; bad; ugly; Ritsu. An interesting mix. The royal family are wonderfully psychotic. Ariara is a standout hero.

Yuri: 9. It’s everywhere, as framework, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Service: 5. The filmy fronds (on young, old, and really old alike). Nothing more.

Overall: 7. Or 8. I’m going to give it 8, possibly because I was expecting such a tiny number here.

…and so Ariara has scaled the royal castle tower and is frantically kicking butt to rescue Eriera, when E helpfully states that violence is never a solution. And then she says it again. At which point A replies, in effect, Oh for Chrissake…it can’t be helped.

They’re married all right.

Erica here: Holy….what the heck did I just read? (◎_◎)
Well, if, after this review you are motivated to check this out, the first chapter is online on Poco².  
Happy 10th review and thanks, as always!

Wahoooo! It’s Guest Review Wednesday and we have a Guest Review! Fresh from the keyboard of the always stellar Bruce P, today he looks at three manga at once (presumably because the idea of reviewing them each individually was soul crushing.) Take it away, Bruce!  

***

“Make a remark,” said the Red Queen: “it’s ridiculous to leave all the conversation to the pudding!”

And there really is no other reason for a review of Yuritetsu ~ Shiritsu Yurigasaki Joshikou Tetsudobu Volume 2, Volume 3  and Volume 4 (ゆりてつ~私立百合ヶ咲女子高鉄道部) by Matsuyama Seiji. The review of Volume 1 should have been quite enough. But in the face of good taste Yuritetsu has thrived, even making some minor noise out in the real world. I would hate to leave the final word to a pudding. A response is called for. Here it is:

Eww.

You might notice that this also effectively described Volume 1.

Which is not to say that Volumes 2-4 are just more servings of the same goo. The author has made a number of significant changes. Though calling anything in this manga significant seems kind of silly.

High school girls Elsie, Lacie, Tillie, and Peanut are still doing what members of the Yuritetsu (Yurigasaki Girl’s High School Railway Club) do best: looking like four-year-olds, acting like three-year-olds, and providing railway maps and information for train fans. Train fans who don’t much care where their maps and information come from, provided they come from girls who occasionally take their clothes off. Elsie, Lacie, and Tillie continue fighting over Peanut, while Peanut continues displaying no reason why they should actually want to. Maybe it’s a pheromone thing. It’s certainly not an intellect thing.

The big difference from the first volume is that the girls no longer do their interpersonal squirming in isolation from the rest of the world. Quite the contrary: in their travels they now encounter an astonishing assortment of other ambulatory pumpkin seeds—friends, relatives, and acquaintances, starting with their new traveling companion, the club’s faculty advisor Konomi-Sensei. She looks five, giving her the best of it, though she doesn’t act that mature. As a teacher, she’s just happy not to live in New Jersey, or in any number of places where they insist on background checks; at Yurigasaki she can squirm against Peanut all she wants. Pheromones, ick.

Artistically Yuritetsu isn’t so much a mess as a collage, which makes it sound intentional.  Stylistically different (but equally embarrassing) crossover characters from the small world of train-themed manga randomly drop out of the blue for a little inbreeding. Among these artistic inconsistencies are several creepy crossovers from one of the author’s own titles, Tetsuko na Sanshimai, about three sisters who travel around on trains (well, when you specialize, you specialize). One of these sisters is definitely not drawn as a Yuritetsu –style four year old, and in fact does not even constitute a structural possibility. As Elsie (or is it Tillie? Dopey?) says when they first meet: “Oneesan! Your boobs—and your camera lens—are huge!!” The art might be questionable, but the sophistication of the dialogue makes the series sparkle.

And here’s the peculiar real world part. In the final chapter the girls visit the Yuri Kogen Railway, a tiny line in the mountains south of Akita. In a clever bit of marketing, or desperation (it’s a very tiny line), the Yuri Kogen last year decorated an operating railcar in a Yuritetsu illustration scheme. All pink and yellow and oversized bubbleheads. Looks like desperation to me. The Yuritetsu railcar has actually been out there, trundling Peanut and her pals, along with confused Yuritetsu fans wondering why all the car-side characters seem so fully clothed, back and forth through the daffodils.

If there’s a special hell for railway motormen, it probably looks like this.

Toy maker Tomytec has jumped into the act with a scale model:

The item above was obtained for research purposes. Just being thorough.

As for the Yuri: the characters in Yuritetsu remind me of nothing so much as those tiny, rather pointless insects that form hyperactive clouds over water on summer afternoons. Among the little bugs in these mating swarms there may well be some rudimentary Yuri flirtations going on (who knows?), but it wouldn’t warrant a four volume treatment and a specially decorated swamp boat.

Ratings:

Art: 5.  Well, the train illustrations are still pretty good.
Characters: 2. Dropping in some doofus ex machina characters hasn’t helped this number at all.
Story: 2.  Starts low, falls through a hole at the bit with the strawberry.
Yuri: 2.  Don’t ask about the strawberry.
Service: 10.  No really, don’t.

Overall: 3. Somewhere between eww and ick.

It’s been a lot of fun, chewing these four volumes up. But now of course I will have to make a trip to Akita. For research purposes.

Erica here: As long as I don’t have to be seen near that train, I’m in.

Thank you for yet another fantastic review of a book I wouldn’t touch with a 15 meter pole.  This seemed like a perfect April 1 review. If you buy these books, the joke is clearly on you. ^_^