Cutey Honey Seed Manga, Volume 1

May 19th, 2006

Ah, the perfect thing, to end trash week – Cutey Honey Seed. There are so many things wrong with this series I’m not sure where to begin.

Okay, so, let’s play “let’s pretend.” Let’s pretend that Cutey Honey is nothing more than a wildly successful franchise of anime, manga, live action movies, games and related goods. You know, the kind of things that appeal to lonely otaku… ;-)

Cutey Honey Seed is like the bastard child of every horrible impotent dorky boy – oversexed beautiful babe manga ever. We meet Yuuta, a typical example of otaku-dom. He’s got a beautiful girl living next door, Midori, who is really nice and *obviously* likes him, but hey, he’s too nerdy to actually ask her out or anything. So when an alien crashes nearby and he’s saddled with an even more beautiful girl, he’s paralytic with incompetence. He gives the alien the name Kisaragi Honey, just like his favorite media heroine.

Honey is an alien, therefore naive, innocent and impressionable in every way, except that she gets the “flaunting your body parts” part right. As circumstances require, she develops “super powers” just like the “real” Cutey Honey’s, in order to save herself, Yuuta and his loved ones. After she watches most of Yuuta’s Cutey Honey collection, she ends the volume by transforming as Honey does to please Yuuta – even going so far as to shout “Honey Flash!”.

For his part, Yuuta spends the entire volume being as tiresome as possible, trying to hide Honey’s existence and when that fails, just bald-facedly lie about her, while juggling sexual fantasies about Midori with sexually suggestive situations with Honey that he doesn’t follow up on. For her part, Midori, who stumbles upon Honey almost immediately, thereafter follows up by coming in on Yuuta and Honey in a remarkable number of suggestive positions without once being suspicious or irritated. How nice for Yuuta that the two women in his life are physically sexy without having a single brain cell between the two of them. To the kind of person who shares their evening with blow-up sex toys, these two must look like the perfect mate. Let us not forget the over-sexed teacher, Midori’s hostess mother, and Yuuta’s little sister. Yuuta is surrounded by a whole world of female stereotypes, none of which he will ever go to bed with. How exhausting.

Oh, and the cute actress that plays Cutie Honey in the movies that Yuuta likes is somehow drawn into the story, as well.

This series is written by Go Nagai, but not drawn by him and it looks it. The art is slick, typically harem-shounen-dorky boy with beautiful, frontal lobe-less babe. Nothing like Nagai’s disturbing and surreal take on the human form. In this first volume we’re not given any Panther Claw-type baddies – the emergencies Honey handles range from a pack of tedious guys trying to pick her up for a little light gang rape to Midori’s mom setting the house on fire by falling asleep with a cigarette lit. We can only *pray* for the intrusion of the Panther Claw. No Na-chan. Boo hoo.

Ratings:

Art – 6 It looks like every mediocre harem series ever.
Story – 4 A vaguely interesting meta-twist on on the Honey story
Characters – 1 Seriously, if you think these are good characters, you and I will never, ever be able to be friends
Yuri – 0
Service – 9
Overall – 3

Unless future volumes leap into my lap with a “YURI!” sticker on them, you won’t be seeing any more reviews of this series here.

Posted in Cutie Honey | 1 Comment »


Yuri Manga: Eve’s Apple/Eve no Ringo, Volume 5

May 17th, 2006

While I’m in the mood for trashy manga, let’s finish up this most delightful piece of dreck, Eve no Ringo, Eve’s Apple.

In case you’re new, or have forgotten the…erm, we’ll call it a plot for argument’s sake, here are a list of my reviews of earlier volumes:

Volume 1, Volume 2 and Volume 3 and Volume 4.

Let me also remind you that you can purchase any of these 5 volumes through Amazon Japan, simply by clicking the pictures of the cover on each review. It’ll transport you directly to the correct page (as *almost* all of the pictures for these reviews do.)

The first chapter begins with a cheerful Kirika, enjoying a dinner with the evil editor and her friend Matsuda. As Kirika and editor natter on, Matsuda finds the distance between them and him growing exponentially. To assuage his ego, Matsuda visits senior manga artist Miyamae dressed as the editor. Miyamae and Matsuda have a little playtime, but ultimately it only makes Miyamae want the real thing. We get a glimpse of her true feelings.

As usual, the Mio chapter is annoying. While she screws one of the editors, she is *still* planning on defeating Kirika…whatever that means. It’s really exhausting, especially as her goody-two-shoes image is well beyond tarnished.

Evil editor makes a short visit to Kirika’s school festival. She returns the favor by arriving at his office late, just in time to see Miyamae collapse in his arms – and for him to call her by her given name, Mizuho. Kirika leaves unseen, with her heart completely broken. She has to face the fact that Miyamae and Mitsugu have had, and may still have, a relationship.

Matsuda angsts about Kirika, and Kirika angsts about her editor (it kind of makes sense that she’d fall in love with an apparently abusive, yet actually caring, guy, if you think about it.) Matsuda spends some time trying to cheer Kirika up, but she pretty much leaves him behind. When he goes to Miyamae’s, she turns him away with an apology, explaining that she really doesn’t want a fake Mitsugu anymore.

Two of the girls in school are having a torrid affair in the doctor’s office. When Kirika interrupts she finds the doctor and Yurika (now *there’s* a fanfic waiting to happen…) under the bed “studying” the couple. The two girls bail, Yurika and the doctor protest Kirika’s interruption. Yurika mentions casually that she knows a guy who does Adult Videos, would Kirika like to see? Sure!

So they go to the AV studio and the guy finds himself short of a dom. So, Kirika volunteers. Hey, how cool, she’s going to be an AV star! Yurika offers to be sub, and away they go. Since both of them know what they are doing, the director is mightily pleased – and so is Grant Oldman, erm, no, no, not really. It’s the S&M guy from an earlier volume. He likes Kirika’s style. So she’s great as a ojou-sama, but she falls asleep the next day at school and fails her test…

Kirika meets with the S&M guy, who tells her she has good dominatrix style. She’s pleased with herself as she visits the offices of her editor…who assigns her a good project. But, as she watches Mitsugu and Miyamae interact, their free way with each other, she gets more and more depressed. Kirika stands up and announces that she’s leaving manga. Miyamae follows her, but Kirika only becomes angrier and says that she’s leaving to become a professional S&M queen.

Matsuda is still drawing his happy, cutesy manga when Kirika comes to visit. She asks him to join her at her S&M studio. How could he refuse? He’s her best friend! So once again, Matsuda takes a beating for love. Her mentor coaches her on the most beautiful way to do this and in a sudden revelation, Kirika understands…she is now able to administer beautiful torture. Afterwards Matsuda asks if this is really what she wants and she says she’s pretty sure it is.

Yurika and Matsuda run into Kirika in a fetish shop and Yurika slaps Kirika for leaving them. Kirika goes home and draws a bit, remembering how much fun it was to be a mangaka. But then she remembers her editor, and she cools off.

It’s graduation time. Matsuda and Kirika are free! Yurika stops by to visit and they all go to a reception at the magazine’s office. Kirika has decided to return to manga after all – the evil editor bows and welcomes her formally (and politely as Kawai-sensei,) to their magazine, which moves her. Miyamae shows off the diamond on her left hand. Kirika jokes that she’s landed Mitusgu at last. They have a big toast to all the “new” manga artists, at which Kirika’s collar and chain around her neck become visible. Okay, so maybe not *quite* leaving the side job as S&M Queen behind. :-)

Back in high school, Mai, Kirika’s kouhai in the chado (tea) club is thoroughly befuddled as to what to do with all that…tea stuff. As her new underclassmen demand leadership (she tells Kirika) she decides to teach them what *she’s* learned. Kirika, naturally, tells her “How nice – go for it.” ^_^

Ratings:

Art – 6
Story – 6
Characters – 8
Yuri – 4
Service – Yes

It’s utterly without merit. But it really wasn’t *bad*! Like with every volume previously, it was kind of fun and (other than Matsuda’s issues) the sex is guilt and tedium-free. And actually good for a few laughs.

Posted in Hentai, Yuri Manga | No Comments »


Yuri Manga: Shoujo Sect 2

May 15th, 2006

I wasn’t planning on reviewing Shoujo Sect 2 yet, but when I came home today there it was on the table, and I thought, “Eh, why not.” ^_^;

In the first volume of Shoujo Sect, which I reviewed on February 27, 2006, we are introduced to the residents of one particular dorm at one particular girls’ high school. Most of the residents are having sexual relations with at least one other resident of the dorm – in some cases, several others.

At the end of volume one, Honda Shinobu confesses that, despite the fact that she is surrounded by a harem of girls with whom she is having sex, she actually likes Naitou Momoko. (Once again, btw, I refuse to use the official spellings. I’m not sure they were done strangely on purpose, but they are decidedly strange to the eye that is used to “correct” Japanese transliteration. I’m sticking with the furigana.)

Naitou has to navigate the labyrinth of Honda’s affairs – and the fact that she (Naitou) is currently seeing her teacher – before she can begin to decide how she feels about Honda.

In the meantime, Naitou continues her habit of being catalyst, or at least present, as one of her bandmates is tag-teamed by two of her kouhai, who happen to be twins. (Gosh, that’s original, isn’t it? )

Honda comforts Enjyoji Maya with some private time, even as she and Naitou step up their contentious courtship – Shinobu gives Momoko chocolate…Momoko responds with a ring.

Kirin, who usually functions as Honda’s maid, decides to let Honda know that, regardless of her feelings for Naitou, she feels that Honda belongs to her. She won’t stand in Shinobu and Momoko’s way, but…

…evil sempai Sayuri overhears Kirin and Honda. After Kirin leaves, she has her way with Honda, despite Honda’s protests. Since this is the first time we’ve seen Shinobu protest, it’s especially creepy. Naitou is walking by the room, and overhears voices. Honda prays that she will move on, but Naitou decides to call Honda’s phone. When it rings, she comes into the room and sees Sayuri and Honda in dishabille. Honda begs Naitou to understand, and Sayuri stalks off, full of herself. Momoko follows Sayuri and, in a completely out of the blue, “whoah!” moment, knocks Sayuri cold with a fire extinguisher.

Naitou transfers out of school and isn’t heard from again for months. Honda moves out of the dorm and Maya moves out with her. One day, Maya and Honda are out walking when Honda’s phone rings with a message from Naitou. Honda goes running to find Naitou. Maya excuses herself, and leaves the two of them alone. They go back to Naitou’s nearly-empty, electricity-less apartment and finally(!) make love.

The next chapter takes place the “Day After Shoujo Sect” at Naitou’s new school. A classmate rushes to hide a note from someone that was pasted to her shoe locker. Sonoko confronts her friend Kaori on the roof later that day, telling her to not leave things like her email in the locker. Kaori and she end up fighting and confessing their love for one another…and as this is Shoujo Sect, they make love on the roof. The next day there is a note in Sonoko’s shoe locker and she cheerfully tells Naitou that it’s from her lover.

The Extra Chapter actually makes the whole thing worth getting, in my opinion. Up to this point, it’s been a series of PWP sex encounters – some good, some bad, depending on what you like. If you’re just interested in the sex, then it’s not a bad series just for that. But the epilogue actually kind of ties everything up in a amusing package that nonetheless remains completely consistent to the rest of the story.

Time has passed, Honda Shinobu and Naitou Momoko are living together. Honda is rushing off to work, and Naitou is lazing around as a college student. Honda runs off to be teased and sexually harrassed in a not at all mean-spirited way by her seniors at the office. They obviously find her cute – her sexual charisma hasn’t tarnished at all since high school. Naitou and Enjyoji Maya, now in medical school, and still living with Honda, have some pleasant morning sex to pass the time. Honda ends up calling home to get something to the office. Instead of sending it, Naitou and Maya both comes to visit. So Honda’s little secret is quite out. Now all her office sempai know about her and Naitou and Maya…and erm, just about everyone else.

The sempai decided that they want a little of the Honda charm and rewrite the office rules to require not only a morning greeting, but a morning kiss – and a coffee break kiss and a lunchtime kiss… insert “bwa bwa bwaaaa” silly noise here.

It’s a goofy, but also kind of sweet ending for what is otherwise pretty much pure Yuri porn.

Ratings:

Art – 8
Story – 6
Character – 7
Yuri – 10
Service – 10

Overall – 8

Sexy? Yes. Good? Not really – but not bad either.

Posted in Shoujo Sect, Yuri Manga | 8 Comments »


More Utter Nonsense

May 13th, 2006

The only reason I haven’t posted a review the last few days, was that I was feeling lazy. To make it up to you, I thought I’d post a list of the blogs *I* read regularly. These are in no particular order. You may wonder why I don’t just include them on the side bar as links. Don’t apply for a mangerial position anywhere until you *do* understand why. :-) If you understand why, then you know what I mean. LOL

The Dilbert Blog – I read Scott Adam’s blog regularly not because I think he’s smarter or funnier than I am, but because his comments about the kinds of things he deals with from his “fans” so eerily parallel my own experiences and ideas that I find it relaxing to read his expressions of the kinds of things I think and say all the time myself.

Aozora Art – This is Rica Takashima’s (yuri manga artist extraordinaire and author of Rica ‘tte Kanji!”,) blog (in Japanese.) We pretty much keep in touch all the time anyway, but I enjoy reading her thoughts about her art projects and even her day-to-day minutiae.

Cocktail Party Physics is not only fun, intelligent, fascinating and noteworthy, but also written by a good friend of mine. I like reading CPP if only to remind myself that once upon a time I considered becoming a physicist. :-) Jen’s writing is sharp and fun. And the cocktail recipes in the sidebar are a scream.

Zyl has become a good friend of Yuricon, and I find myself reading Hontou ni so omou? more and more often. I don’t watch every anime he’s watching, or agree with all of his opinions, but he’s funny, he plugs Yuricon and Okazu all the time and I find myself wanting to know what he thinks – especially when we don’t agree.

Blogorrhea is a blog I have only recently started following. Lee Kottner is a fellow fanfic and professional author and all around creative type. Last time we spent time together, we decided that, despite the several years difference in our ages, we must have been separated at birth…it was getting a little creepy, in fact. :-)

Yuri Kokoro is a Japanese yuri blog I’ve mentioned on Okazu before. I admit I haven’t been checking it with the same frequency I used to, for various reasons. I’m going to get back in the habit.

I scan a bunch of other blogs too, for personal and professional interest: Slashdot, PC World, Researchbuzz, Dialog Updated Bluesheets, Yuri News. I also check the Anime News Network, Anime Nation news, and ICV2 from time to time.

And lastly, I read a bunch of Japanese yuri artist’s websites, whenever I have a free moment. But I’ll save that for a future post.

I’m spending the weekend doing some reading – the 14th Marimite novel, Suzukaze Satsusatsu, and the original Hana no Asuka-gumi supplementary stories, and I hope to get some writing for Saiyuu no Ryouko in. I’ll be back with reviews next week!

Posted in Now This Is Only My Opinion | 1 Comment »


Kamikaze Girls Novel

May 10th, 2006

Oh.My.God.

To say that the novel Kamikaze Girls was sheer brilliance would be a dreadful understatement, but given the limitations of my beloved English, it’s the best I can do. This book is *brilliant*. Like, shiny brilliance. And genius brilliance, and any other possible meaning we can squeeze out of those 10 letters.

The book begins with a long, detailed and shockingly objective discussion of the true heart of the baroque – and of the gothic lolita. It was so good that not only was I hysterical laughing plenty of times, but I’m pretty sure it completely changed my opinion of Goth-Loli forever.

The surreal tale of the meeting of yanki gang girl Ichiko, and hardcore Goth-Loli Momoko is not radically different than the portrayal in the movie, but several of the stranger, sillier touches added in the movie are not in the novel. Once again I am reminded that the correct order for me is to first watch the visual version, movie, TV, anime, what have you, then manga, THEN read the original literature. It means that with every new version you have a richer, more detailed experience with new layers. If I go the other way around…I’ll be unhappy at the things that were cut or changed. (And let me tell you how worried I am, that having read the next few Maria-sama ga Miteru novels means that I won’t enjoy the third season of anime as much.)

I honestly can’t express how good this book is. The translator did such an amazing job, switching back and forth with levels of politeness – not only from character to character, but also just within Momoko’s narration….it was breathtaking.

Also stunningly brilliant was the fact that none of the Japanese puns or concepts were translated – they were explained, or simply left as is, with a Glossary in the back. Perfect! Viz scores a perfect 10 in this.

In fact, the ONLY downside I can think of, is that one very rude word – which is presented as a very rude word – isn’t defined in the glossary and I’d really like to know what it meant. ^_^

Yuri? No. But plenty of shinyuu, right in that space where two women are emotionally, karmically connected and yes, love one another, without being “in love.” In the end, Momoko rides off on the back of Ichiko’s bike, her head against the yanki‘s back, “like a lover’s”. So, okay – maybe not Yuri…yet. ^_^

Ratings:

10

Just read it.

Posted in Novel | 6 Comments »