Yuri Anime: Noir, Volume 6

December 19th, 2007

May 5, 2005. That was the date I reviewed the first translated volume of the now-classic Noir. And I’m *still* not done reviewing this series. lol Don’t want to rush things, ya know?

It’s a testament to the genre’s growth in the past two years that it’s taken me so long to get around to Volume 6. (Check out the Noir category on the sidebar for the other reviews.)

My first thought, upon pulling this down from the shelf where it lives was to wonder how it would hold up in my post-Madlax, post-El Cazador de la Bruja brain. It’s a testament to the series that I found it as enchanting, as exhilarating and as entertaining as I remembered it being the first time around. When I have a weekend where I have time to take myself off-line for three days or so, I’m going to marathon them all in a row just to see what a head-to-head comparison leads to. ^_^

In fact, Noir was so good, that I found myself taking notes to remind myself of the things I wanted to mention here. I wrote them down in no particular order and they will be relayed to you with the same randomness as I conceived of them. ^_^

The sound of a shell being ejected from a gun is a sound that fills all three of the “girls with guns on the run” trilogy. It’s almost, in a creepy way, comforting to hear it. Ah, we’re in a Bee Train series about women who kill things. Ahhh…

Volume 6 provides us with as much of an explanation of the internal political situation in Soldats as we’re going to get – and it’s a good place to realize that Altena is pretty much barking mad. One half of Soldats is about the power and money, very Illuminati-esque, and Altena, cracked as she is, wants to destroy the world for its “own good” and return to an 11th century “purity,” using the two maidens who embrace sin. Um, yeah, sounds great, uh gotta go, look at the time… All I’m saying is that Altena, Friday Monday and Rosenberg in a room together would rival Sartre’ for surreal conversation.

The one thing I thought was exhausting was that Chloe was there at the horrible past event that, when both Mirielle and Kirika remember it, pretty much changes nothing, except for their ability to be honest with one another. Please. Mirielle’s house must have been crawling with random people wandering in and out or something. Cats, kids with guns, donkeys, etc,….

I also noticed that Chloe’s eyes are really small and suspicious, like adults typically have, but her worldview is surprisingly naive and childlike. In contrast, Kirika’s eyes are huge, like the typical little girl, but her worldview is very scarred and bitter and adult.

In Volume 6, you can actually pinpoint the moment where everything unravels. Kirika begs Mirielle to kill her now that they know the “truth,” since that was what they had promised. Mirielle fails to do so. Kirika interprets Mirielle’s failure as a form of punishment, forcing her to stay alive and face her crimes. Mirielle inteprets her failure as a weakness of spirit when all it is, really, is that she’s grown to care about Kirika.

From this point, Kirika erroneously decides to embrace her fate as Noir, since she believes that Mirielle has rejected her. Mirielle is grasping at trying to put some meaning on her failure to keep their promise. When she reads Kirika’s farewell letter, she realizes what it means, and it gives her strength to go after Kirika.

Which brings me to the letter. “Daisukina Mirielle” it reads, which the translators translate as “Dear Mirielle.” Which I think is fair, although I really would have preferred, “My dear Mirielle,” as encompassing a slightly more intense, but no less ambiguous, feeling.

As I’ve mentioned here many times, Bee Train has publicly said that if you want to see Yuri in Noir see it. If not, don’t. I know that Yuri fans want commitment from the creators of anime so that we can point to a series and say “See? This is *Yuri*!” which is why Strawberry Panic will always be popular. Noir is not that series. But whether you see Kirika’s letter as an admission of love love, or of friend love, it’s still a nice letter and a great scene.

Interestingly, the liner notes for this volume include a little essay on Yuri in Noir. Overall it gives a fair assessment, considering the Yuri as part of fan parody, the fans playing with this series. The conclusion drawn is, basically – feel free to have a little fun with the characters and if you see Yuri, go ahead and see Yuri. It interests me to note that Bee Train and the director felt like they could “have a little fun” with the characters in El Cazador themselves, and make the Yuri a little less ambiguous while they were at it. ^_^ As if they were heeding their own advice.

The other extra of note was an interview with one of my all-time favorite seiyuu, Hisakawa Aya, as she discusses voicing Chloe and her relationship with the other voice actresses. I clearly have to go back and watch the extras for earlier volumes that I completely missed. Duh.

Ratings:

Art – wildly inconsistent from 4-7
Character – 8
Story – 8
Yuri – 5
Service – 1, but I can’t actually think of much

Overall – 8

The other thing I wanted to mention is that joining conspiracies is definitely the way to go. All the Soldats, Enfant and Leviathan folks seemed to have been pretty successful, so there’s obviously some kind of lesson in that. ^_^



Yuri Live-Action: Cutie Honey the Live

December 17th, 2007

It’s not like Cutie Honey the Live is good or anything. In fact, it’s pretty horrid; a veritable blivet of pandering, service and pervtastic-ness. And yet…I love it. Like Ikkitousen and Kannazuki no Miko, I can look past the stuff crammed into it to pander to the somewhat-lower-than-lowest-common-denominator to see something worth watching.

Like all of the versions in the Cutie/Cutey Honey mythos (barring Cutie Honey Seed) in this edition, Kisaragi Honey is the android daughter of the brilliant Professor Kisaragi. Like the original CH manga, Honey is a schoolgirl and her best friend and roommate at the White Rose School (Shirobara Gakuen) is Aki Natsuko. In this incarnation Na-chan is sadly reduced to a cringing dweeb – a far cry from the hyper-competent, muscular, gun-toting public peace officer I loved in Cutey Honey a-GoGo.

After the initial story of Honey’s existence and the death of her father, this Live-Action TV series deviates from the previous incarnations. Hayami Seiji is a homeless doofus who fancies himself a suave guy and crack private investigator. He’s really just an amusingly jerky guy. The kind of role a young Bruce Campbell might have played.

Honey this time is a bit bubble-headed, but likeable. She has no ego or pride, which makes it virtually impossible for the school bully and her henchchicks to make fun of Honey – something that they keep trying to do and at which they fail amusingly every time. I prefer Honey to be a bit more on the ball, but I have to give this actress some real credit – she’s got some actual stunt skills and does not at all suck in the role.

Panther Claw seems to be run by four leaders (who in my head I call Black Claw, Silver Claw, Scarlet Claw and the to be named, but probably Cobalt or Gold Claw.) Black Claw is a super-suave, bilingual metrosexual and Silver Claw is a schizoid personality. They are both good fighters and play a variety of freakish games that utilize society’s most pathetic people, to make money. (And while I wouldn’t swear to it, I believe that the old guy who keeps winning the games is Go Nagai himself.)

Scarlet Claw just showed up a few episodes ago and with her, the first real sign of Yuri. (I knew we’d get some eventually. Along with the panty shots and dress-up and other fetishy stuff, Yuri’s a good bet in CH.) By day, she’s a teacher at a high-end school and she’s clearly seduced several of her female students (and, just as clearly has no time for her male ones.) She also has a really disgusting egg fetish thing which I found quite nasty, but she made up for it by having an aesthetically pleasing costume as Scarlet Claw. :-) (The two guys just wear suits. Boring.) Scarlet Claw is totally an EPL. Thumbs up.

Now, here’s where the story starts to get good. In this incarnation, Honey is not the only AI-system android. Early on, we encounter the world’s most miserable girl, Miki. Where Honey lives happily, going to school, playing with Seiji and his homeless friends and generally being hopelessly cheerful, Miki’s existence is full of misery and grim, with a side of despair. We first encounter her in a girl’s juvenile detention center – and no one likes her there. Poor Miki. Only, she’s not helpless and when the Panther Claw start killing girls mysteriously at juvie, Miki takes matters into her own hands. Where Honey wears a red heart pendant, Miki wears a blue spade and also becomes a “Cutie”-type android…although I blank from calling her Cutie Miki, ’cause she such a miserable soul. ^_^;

Miki transfers to Honey’s school, but rebuffs Honey’s attempts at being friends. Miki learns that Honey is also an android, but manages to keep her own existence as one secret. Miki’s awesome – and kinda hot too. Scarlet Claw has some fun groping her, but of course she and Honey escape the evil clutches, etc, etc. Miki’s actress also has some decent physical skills, but not as much as Honey’s actress.

And that, I thought, was going to be that. Only, I was totally wrong. Yay!

In one episode, the school bully and her henchchicks recruit Miki to destroy Honey’s reputation. Cleverly they come up with a plan to make Miki do bad stuff and blame Honey, so it will sound like Honey’s doing the bad things herself. The first thing they try is to steal money from a sweet, naive rich girl. But she’s so eager to help them that she gladly hands over a lot of money and the bully and her henchchicks freak. “Put that away!” they yell. “Someone’s going to steal that!!” Trust me – it was funny. The rich girl walks off bemused, but concerned for the person she thinks is Kisaragi Honey. Several episodes later, the same rich girl, Yuki, is kidnapped. Because she’s charmingly loopy, she tries to help the kidnapper, eventually meeting the real Honey and engaging her assistance. Together, they save the day – and the life of the kidnapper.

In episode 10 Yuki, once again in the story, eventually confesses to Hayami (well, threatens him, really) that she’s in love with Honey. So, they go on a date. Unfortunately Hayami comes along and you know this isn’t going anywhere, but yay! Yuki’s in love with Honey! And that’s not even the best part. Silver Claw and Black Claw double-team Honey and beat her unconscious. Yuki runs up, demanding to know what they are doing. When they send their Panther Claws mooks after her, Yuki presses the white diamond pendant she wears and – lo and behold! – we’re up to three AI-system androids. Yuki leaps another notch up in yayness. Yuki’s actress is clearly a dancer and has pretty much no “fighting” skills – her moves are very PGSM-style “fighting.”

All of this leads me to believe that we are one Claw and one android short on the series, because it defies logic to think that we have a heart, a spade and a diamond, but won’t be getting a club. And here’s where I *just* had a brilliant thought. ^_^Wouldn’t it be the coolest thing evar if Na-chan was the fourth android? Just thinking out loud, but…cool, huh?

Once again, do *not* be watching this show if panty shots, breasts, maids, nurses and other staples of the fanboy fetish closet bother you. This series is not subtle or classy. But if you can either deal with those things and like me, watch around them or if, heaven forfend, you actually enjoy them, and you like Yuri, Cutie Honey the Live is another notch in Go Nagai’s headboard.

Ratings:

Characters – 7
Story – 5, with moments of 8
Live-Action Adaptation of Manga/Anime – 8
Yuri – 6
Service – 827

Overall – 7

I find the ending sequences rather charming, too. For the most part, we see Honey fighting the masked Panther Claw dudes in a fountain – and she looks like she’s having a blast. The song totally fits her. When Miki arrived, we saw her fighting the PC in the same fountain, looking considerably less cheerful. Again, the song fits her. Now that Yuki has arrived, this week we got *her* fighting the PC, same fountain, and a song for her. It’s kind of cute, actually. Here’s keeping my fingers crossed for Na-chan being the fourth.



Yuricon Shop updated with new Anime, Manga and Drama CDs!

December 16th, 2007

The Yuricon Site update is complete, with the addition of terrific
new anime, manga and Drama CDs on the Yuricon Shop just in time for your holiday wishlist!

Anime:

Iczer-One and Iczer Reborn – relive this classic of early anime – and
early Yuri!

My Otome (Hime-Z/Zhime) – get more great Meister action with Natuski’s Gaderobe Academy

Red Garden – Dead girls, violent battles and a lesbian Student Council President

Manga:

Family Complex – Mikiyo Tsuda’s study of a very complex family

Kannazuki no Miko – Preorder the Tokyopop relase of Kaishaku’s popular story!

Strawberry Panic – pre-order the manga version of love and loss at Astoria.

Also available from Amazon – Yuri Monogatari 3,4 and 5!


Drama CDs:

Hayate x Blade 2 – mayhem at the Tenchi Gakuen school festival

Maria-sama ga Miteru: Cherry Blossom – Shimako meets Noriko

El Cazador – Ellis and Nadie hit the road

***

Of course there’s much more on the Yuricon Shop – great Yuricon and “I Love Yuri” items on the gift page and more. And don’t forget the sales on all 100% Yuri from ALC Publishing! One more week to go to save up to %50!


Yuricon
– “For real women who love their women…animated.



Now This Is Only My Opinion, Volume 5

December 15th, 2007

I’m sorry that it took so long for me to get to this. The questions were really good this time and made me think, but it was just my crazy schedule that kept me from answering them, not the complexity. Thanks to everyone who asked questions for this round of “Now, This is Only My Opinion” and I’ll definitely look forward to the next round in spring!

***

Charles asks: Do you believe that Simoun might have been viewed by a larger audience if everyone in the series was Female?

After some serious thought on this, I have to say no. I think it would have been more popular if the bulk of the cast was female, but the lead was male and the plot was much, much simpler. There is a reason why harem anime is eternally popular and profitable. Complexity is not it. Dorky boys surrounded by beautiful girls who fawn over him, is. If the creators had gone for a Gundam-like franchise – which was not at all where they were going with Simoun – the lead would still have to be male for the average fanboy to care.

Haruchin asks: I was wondering if you might be able to identify some key characters in anime who speak in specifically accented Japanese? My favourite accent is the Kyoto dialect, so in the interests of narrowing the search, I’ll limit the question to Kyoto-ben in particular. We all know about Shizuru, but are there any others out there?

This did take some work, but thankfully not so much that I began to resent you. ^_^ Obviously, the Osaka-ben is instantly identifiable to many fans, and a lot of popular seiyuu use their Osakan roots to bring this across. Hisakawa Aya, one of my perennial favorites, is known for her Osaka-ben as Ichino in Battle Athletes and Kero-chan in Card Captor Sakura. And Ueda Kana, who also hails from Osaka, has used her native accent in several roles, including Mikan from Gakuen Alice. (Which really does explain the moment in the 17th Marimite novel when Yumi inexplicably speaks with an Osakan accent.) But as you say, Kyoto-ben is somewhat rarer. Interestingly, shortly after you asked this, I read a Mist magazine story in which one of the characters spoke with Kyoto-ben. It took me a moment to catch on because it looked so odd. ^_^

But, to answer your question, I found a nice little resource here which discusses “Kansai” accents and the qualities thereof: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/KansaiRegionalAccent

They offer these characters as examples: Konoka in Mahou Sensei Negima, and Akesato in Peacemaker Kurogane.

I also found this surprisingly excellent answer on Yahoo Answers about the differences between the various regional accents and Standard Japanese that might be of interest to anyone who enjoys language in and of itself: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071201204112AAzJM2u

Anonymous wonders: Are there any academically peer-reviewed articles on yuri? What’s the state of yuri scholarship?

The answer to the first is “no.” The state of “Yuri scholarship” is that it is just starting to be a thing in and of itself. James Welker writes articles about lesbian readings of early BL/Yaoi magazines, and I have begun to get inquiries from people interested in pursuing research about Yuri, but as of yet, I have not seen any peer-reviewed academic research about Yuri. I hope the folks that have sent me inquiries will be kind enough to send me references to their works when they are published, but there is a general sense of frustration that no one has already written this so they can quote it. (Primary research is a bitch. ^_^)

I look forward to seeing some decent research on Yuri in the coming years.

Anonymous mentions: So why do some European cities have this bizarre spelling in English? Firenze is Florence, Venezia is Venice, Köln is Cologne, München is Munich, etc. What’s up with all of that?

Language. It’s totally freakish. I blame the Germanic tribes who came to England and didn’t know they didn’t know Romance languages, and the Normans who came to England who didn’t care about the right way to pronounce Germanic words. And above all, I blame Latin for being dead, but not dying out properly.

Anonymous writes: About how many people usually show up at the Yyuricon events? and do you know how seven seas yuri title sales doing compared to their other titles? and! is venus virus really not a yuri title?

I don’t keep exact count, because I really don’t care how many people come to an event. I haven’t seen any sales figures for Seven Seas’ Strawberry Line at all, much less as compared with their other titles. And I believe that there is not a single iota of anything like real affection/interest/desire between Lucia and Sumire, so no, it has no Yuri. It has Yuri-service, which is to say that screencaps and splash art imply a relationship that does not exist, so people with no discrimination see a relationship.

Scareknee wants to know: Currently, one of things I am looking to do as a job is be a librarian. How would you describe the job and how does one become a librarian? As in, any necessary degrees or whatnot?

I can totally answer that one! lol The job will differ depending on the environment you choose: academic, K-12, special, corporate, public, etc. And if you specialize in the technical aspects, you’ll be dealing with anything from the computer network to cataloging books, depending on your specialty. I’m a researcher, which means I do exactly what I’m dong *right now* all day long – answering people’s questions about who all knows what. lol And I love my job. I work in a corporate library.

The absolute best way to get any idea of what a library job can be like is to volunteer or get a part time job at a local library. You’ll get to see what it all means and how it all works. In order to get a “para-professional” job – that is, a job that supports the librarians, like document delivery, or library assistant – you’ll need at least a 4-year degree. For a professional job, you’ll want a MLS or MLIS as they call it now – a Master of Library and Information Science degree. If you put “MLIS program” into Google, you’ll see some schools with programs pop up. But you can also look at the American Library Association or Special Libraries Association websites for more info on a program near you. I went to Rutgers – its as good as any of them. :-) Best of luck to you – let me know when you graduate!

Anonymous inquires: Firstly, which flavours of pizza do you think each member of the Yamayurikai prefer? (my guess is that Shimako’s is whatever Sei-sama’s is…. and that Sachiko, if she could be persuaded at all, would have something like foie gras.)

Secondly, how would they resolve the inevitable dispute when ordering the pizza as to how much of each kind to get?

Sachiko is simply fascinated by the process of purchasing pizza, and she’ll eat whatever Yumi orders. Shimako favors strong flavors like anchovies and olives and Sei always asks for weird things, like taramosalata or corn smut. Youko prefers mushrooms, Eriko always orders pineapple because it makes everything else taste weird. Rei and Yoshino both like ham (and don’t mind the pineapple with that,) Noriko prefers plain old pepperoni, and likes olives, too. Yumi likes pepperoni or plain or corn. Touko doesn’t really have a preference, but she argues anyway. She eats whatever Yumi eats, too.

They never dispute the pizza issue. Whoever orders is considerate enough to get something everyone can agree on. They don’t let Sei order, or Sachiko. Sei orders weirdly and Sachiko takes too long, inquiring about toppings they don’t have. (Although Yumi is starting to think that she’s doing it on purpose.)

Frea posits the following: If you can only use one utensil the rest of your life for both eating and cooking, what would it be?

Spoon, no question. The answer was unanimous here. We’d all happily be spoons.

Have you read any good (non-anime/manga related) books lately?

Hell yeah. I am 7 pages from the end of Thomas Pynchon’s 1100 page Against the Day. Fabulous book – awesome writer. I also recently read a bunch of trashy lesbian novels which I have been and will be reviewing here on Okazu.

Have you read any of the other books of the Dune series? If so, how were they?

I read the first 5. The first one was excellent, then they degraded from there. The best part of the series is the National Lampoon spoof Doon, the Dessert Planet which I quote constantly.

What’s your opinion about fansubs/scanlations? Do you think they affect the anime industry?

I think that they are not a bad thing in and of themselves. Assuming we’re talking non-licensed material. They bring anime and manga that is otherwise not available to a wider audience and create a fanbase. BUT. They also bring a false sense of entitlement and ownership to the fans. The problem is, simply, that fansubbers/scanlators and their consumers are killing the anime/manga they purport to love. Justin Sevakis wrote a really cogent “open letter” to the industry both here and in Japan and I thought he not only summed up the problem exceedingly well, he also suggested a sensible way to approach an answer.

What is the origin of the terms “neko/tachi”?

This one took some work! Japanese Wikipedia on Lesbian Terms says that Tachi” comes from “Tachiyaku” the leading role of Kabuki, i.e., the male lead. There is no etymology provided for “Neko” on Ja.wikipedia, but just now, looking around I see one site (no sources) that says that “neko” comes from “nemu” + “ko” – meaning, the girl you sleep with.

Anonymous requests: Is yuri a reinvention of esu and ome? What’s the relationship between “esu and ome” and yuri? What has persisted from esu and ome? What has vanished?

That’s not really a nutshell answer question – it’s more like the subject of a whole paper. ^_^

“Ome” and the term that superseded it, “Esu” were both related to early 20th century socio-political feminist (and associated lesbian) movements. Like the American feminists of the 1970s, there was both an assumption of purity in an all-female society – a power in “sisterhood” (Esu) – and a split over whether the next step, political lesbianism, should be embraced or rejected. I won’t attempt to make any conclusions about any of the above. I’m just summing up the situation. The term “Yurizoku” was coined at just about the time that the “Lavender menace” appeared and again, it’s well beyond my ability to make any direct connection, except to say that the the post-Stonewall 1970s were a time of socio-political upheaval everywhere and gays and lesbians all over the world were starting to speak up.

In as much as one can say that every generation reconstructs the one before them, the answer to your question is yes – and no.

No first. No, because “Yuri” was reinvented, not by lesbians seeking identity, but by men using the newly coined word to label lesbian sex for their own titillation. These doujinshi artists and porn makers were not looking backwards to the roots of Japanese lesbian identity.

But, yes. Because *I* was. Yuri was imported to the west with that meaning of “porn for men.” Then I got a hold of it and reinvented the word to include not only the explicit lesbian porn, but stories of romance, and even more importantly – stories written *by* women, by lesbians, for a female/lesbian, audience (something that in Japan is still not called “Yuri.”) So, yes, I purposefully reached back to the roots of Esu, to Yoshiya Nobuko’s works, and gathered in everything that reflects lesbian experience under the umbrella “Yuri.” The fact that Yuri is commonly seen as a genre for women here in the US (I base this on the emails I receive and the interviews I have done) means that I’ve been successful in my “reclaiming” of the term.

I hope that this is a coherent enough answer, ’cause it’s all you’re gonna get without me being paid by the word. ^_^

Diana asks: Whenever or wherever I read manga or watched anime someone will said something like this to me ‘What are you? 12?’. As I’m 20 years younger than you, so, why do you think they said that to me and what am I suppose to tell them back?

The reason they say that is that their only experience of anime is Pokemon and the like. Face it – most anime is marketed here to children. Not teens – children. And this is that three-second moment you get when someone who doesn’t give a shit asks you something in an aggressive manner forcing you to respond quickly because they really don’t care, they just wanted to pretend to. Depending on your mood, you could try “I’m young at heart.” Or if you were feeling sarcastic you could try, “Yes. ‘Survivor’s’ too complex for me.” But it’s probably not worth the effort. I’d smile, shrug and say, “There’s more than just Pokemon in the world of anime” and move on.

***

Well, that’s it for this round! That was a lot of work guys! LOL but it was fun. Great questions – I hope my answers don’t suck. Thanks to everyone who wrote in!



Lesbian Novel: The Spanish Pearl

December 15th, 2007

In preparing for my trip to Mexico, I stockpiled a bunch of trashy lesbian novels to take with me. One of the first was The Spanish Pearl by Catherine Friend.

The premise was simple – modern lesbian is transported back in time to 11th century Spain where she falls in love with a man who has a secret. The “secret” was not only obvious – it was stated plainly on the back of the book and in the description on Amazon. The “man” Kate falls in love with is really…gasp! shock!…a woman.

Okay, so I bought the book knowing this and thinking, cool, that would be the first few chapters and then there’d be a story. It was apparent about fifteen seconds after they met that “he” was a she, so I kept waiting for the rest of the story. Only, no, that WAS the story. The whole story. That was it. There was some violence (not enough) and some rape (plenty, thanks) and some internal and external medieval politics (about the right amount) but the main point was Kate figuring out slowly, painfully and awkwardly what any reader knew going into the book.

But you know, that wasn’t really that bad – just sort of “buh?” What was bad was Kate’s insistence on relating to the people around her in 21st century American terms. For instance, in one scene, she berates Louis for killing two men – two men who would have raped Kate, mind you. I would have been kissing Louis and kicking the corpses, but not Kate. She was furious that Louis stooped to violence instead of what – talking their way out of it? If this was day one in the story, I might have accepted it, but it was well into the story. And the reason they were in that situation was also Kate’s fault in the first place after several really bad decisions.

What was also sort of strange was Kate’s obsession about a child she met for less than an hour and her use of that child as an excuse to return to the future. And last, what tanked the book utterly for me was that there’s a sequel. The miserable girlfriend from the future comes back to the past to “rescue” Kate. Thanks. I’ll pass.

For fun, I often read Amazon reviews after I finish a book. To my shock everyone loved this book – they thought it funny and lyrical and a love letter to Spain. No one wrote, “I thought Kate was an ass.” Perhaps I should write a review there, because I totally did think that. ^_^;

On the positive side, Catherine Friend writes well. I don’t think I flinched at any portion of the book (as I did several times during my attempt to read another lesbian novel recently – whole sentences had me cringing. I gave up after the first chapter.) So for that alone, The Spanish Pearl is above average.

Ratings:

Story – 5
Characters – 5
Yuri – 9
Service – not on a bet, but the rape would suffice I imagine – 2

Overall – 5

If you aren’t looking for plot so much as a series of crises set around a relationship, it’s not really that bad a book. And with a blue ocean eating white sand, while you drink a brightly colored drink, you could definitely do worse. But you can also do better.